Huge mistake

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You men act like it’s a great thing when women get raped. We have to live with it forever. Two years ago I was raped by a man I was just nice to I didn’t think I was leading him on. I was 22 yo old and married I was a waitress at a place where we kind of flirt with the customers it improves our tips.
I had a customer who came in a lot he was older in his 40s I think he would tell me if he was younger he would take me home with him. I would always say if you were younger I would go and laugh. Anyway after a few days he ask me out I told him I was married. He said he didn’t care so I politely told him no. He stopped coming in and I thought that was the last of him.
Then about a month or longer my husband had gone to work I was still in bed asleep. When I was awaken by a man in my bed he was undressed with his hand over my mouth. He told me to keep my mouth shut and that I better fuck him better than I ever fucked my husband. Then he put something over my eyes told me to roll over on my back. As I stated to roll I tried to jump off the bed and run. He grabbed my hair punched me in the stomach knocking the wind out of me. Then he pushed me back on the bed hit me again then tied my hands to the footboard of the bed. Then he sat on me ripped my tshirt open and put something in my mouth and then put tape over my mouth.
Next he put his penis between my boobs squeeze them together and started using them to get himself off.
After he got himself off that way he got off me and started pulling off my panties. I kicked at him but he punched me in the stomach and leg it hurt so bad I stopped. Then he pulled off my panties and told my to spread my legs. I did I didn’t want to get hit again. He told me that was a good girl and called me by my name. I now new whoever this was new me. He went down on me using his tongue and fingers he even put a finger in my ass. After he finished doing that he used the bed cover to wipe his cum away from my chest and face. He told me that he was going to fuck me. He then told me to spread my legs again. I kept my legs together and tried to talk but I had something in my mouth. He told me to spread my legs again. I did but kept trying to talk. As he pushed himself inside me I kept trying to talk. So he removed the tape and whatever was in my mouth. I ask him to please use a condom I was trying to have a baby. He pulled out of me put the tape back over my mouth. I laid there for a minute unsure what he was doing he wasn’t moving. And then he told me to open my legs that he was not going to use a condom that he was happy to help my hubby get me pregnant. He did fuck me and I felt him cum inside me. He laid on the bed with me for a little while.
My arms were hurting and I wanted to get to the bathroom and try to push his cum out. As he got off the bed he asked me if I was supposed to work tonight. I don’t really no what to say but I shook my head yes. He told me I better be at work tonight. He left my mouth taped and untied my hands from the footboard but left them tied together. I laid there listening I really never heard him leave but I got my hands free. I went through the house he was gone. I took a long hot shower. I didn’t no what to do I was afraid to call the police I had been in trouble before and I was on probation. I didn’t want to go to work but was afraid not to. So I didn’t say anything to anyone I went to work as nothing had happened.
But things were never good I did get pregnant but don’t no if it was his or my husband’s. I like to think it was my husband’s. I ended up getting fired from my job was told I had a bad personality with the customers. After my baby was born my husband and I got divorce we couldn’t quit fighting.
I can’t prove it but I think it was my customer who ask me out.

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